Identify Me

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Some weeks ago I decided that I want to start doing things that I like. This might sound easy enough, but I had a problem, what do I like?? I always start doing something then get bored in a *very* short period of time and drop it. This always makes me think what is wrong with me? Who doesn't know what they enjoy doing or who doesn't have a hobby? Starting this blog was one of the things towards this step, finding out what I like. It feels weird, like I am getting to know myself, except at 21 I think I should know already? I think it's what you're supposed to do while you're growing up, during your early teen years? Well I suppose it's never too late. My problem mainly is that there is no 'me'. I'm whoever people want me to be. If I'm around people that like anime, then to them I like anime. If I'm around people that like gaming, then to them I am a gamer. But in reality I am not really any of these things. And it's even scarier because I don't know myself what I am. I've realized that I spent half my life doing nothing. It seems the only thing I do well is daydream. It makes the time go by. When I'm bored at work for instance, or stuck on a plane for a few hours, or when I'm at home with nothing to do. I don't know if it's even called daydreaming. I make up whole stories in my head, with people that don't exist, or exist but modified in my own way, how I like them to be. I can make up whole lives thinking like that. Some people might even think it's warped. I don't like this fact, so that is why I have embarked on this mission to find me, myself, who I am, what I like.

So far I have learned this much.

I love reading and books. I sort of knew this because I always read a lot, but I never thought of it as a hobby or something I liked doing, I thought it was another thing you normally do, like eat and sleep. So I like reading. And I'm enjoying this DailyLit thing.

I love food of all sorts, and I enjoy cooking. I'm by no means a pro at it, but it's fun. Right now cooking is a big deal, I am walking with crutches and have to hop on one leg, so that makes things ten times harder, but that should be fixed soon and I will be able to get back to normal. Cooking is fun when you don't have to do it, when you absolutely need to cook so you don't starve, then it's not so fun, but other than that it's great. I am hoping that I can actually get better at this.

I made a Flickr account and started taking pictures. While it is fun to take pictures and post them on a website, I am just crap at it. I don't get the lighting business and I don't really know how to use my camera. I don't get what all the settings are for, for instance ISO 800 or 1200? What is ISO and what does it do? That's just one example for you. When I put my camera on Manual all I see is a dark picture, no matter what settings I adjust, light, color, nothing. That is the reason I leave it on Auto, and that doesn't really work. I know if I really wanted to learn how to take pics I could find out a load about it, Google would probably really help, but I don't, so I'll continue to take pics just for fun.

Well that's a start isn't it?

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